Senior Musings

As a senior, during finals, who should be completing two essays, a final capstone paper, and planning a review session, I decided it was the perfect time to force myself to start blogging again. I find writing to be a rather compulsive activity, particularly when there are a million other things I should be productively writing about, but find myself ever reaching for the less academic, more emotional outlet. So here I am with my research project on the Faerie Queene open, listening to the Lord of the Rings soundtrack (a highly recommended study aid might I add), and writing on a blog which I have clearly neglected for something like eight months. Oh well.

I'm finding myself increasingly interested in departures and welcomes. The thing is, when you lived in another country for a year and had to suffer the most agonizingly emotional goodbyes, one finds that repeating the process at another school is less daunting. Not because the friendships are all less sincere. I will have to say goodbye to my roommate of three (not four because we were both abroad last year) years--a roommate who has become like a sister to me, and who I will not see for quite some time (occupational hazard of living in another country). Rather, the goodbyes are different simply because you have prepared--you know that you cannot repeat the sort of emotional black hole you opened up the first time around. You've learned.

There is another difference in this goodbye. Last year, when I left England I had a summer of work, the realization that I didn't know when I would next see my English friends, and one more year of college left to agonize over. This time around I have something new and exciting to look forward to--ok, so I still have a whole summer (and a long one at that as I'm not leaving until the end of September) of work. But it is productive! A whole extra month of working for the money that I will inevitably spend on studious cups of tea.